The Pearly Gates

The deadly crackle of burning wood
The paralyzing fear when I finally understood
Our house lit up by fire, the murderous roar of the flames
My mind bear but one thought – my sisters’ names
Madly I search for the sound of their voices
Scorching, my skin on fire – but I have run out of choices
Flickering images, lack of breath
Maddening pain, but I must deceive death
For just a while longer, just a few feet left
I bust open their door, my shadow – the choking heat
I lift them in my arms and aim for the streets
But the fire has us trapped
One kick, two kicks
At last the window cracks
I lower them down into my mother’s arms
My angelic baby sisters, finally safe from harm

As the fire burns me, I do not cry
I burn, and burn, and burn
Silently awaiting my time to die
The night lit up by fire
The silence disrupted by a mother’s desire
To save her family, but her son asleep in his pyre
I do not feel pain, everything is alright
Suddenly disturbed by a blinding light

Escorted by two men, clad in the brightest white
My body lack scars, the burning suddenly light
The sun is up, in the middle of the night
They leave me in front of a gate
My heart instantly relieved of all its previous hate
Slowly accepting my tragic fate
All the pain of my existence
Seeping away without resistance
My mind is finally at ease
For the first time since birth, I am at peace
My family and friends are not with me, in this magic place
But I find comfort in knowing that they are safe
A majestic voice, a soothing tone greets me:
” – My child, I am your father”

©Alexander Berg Mattsson,2012

***Author’s Note***
My latest, cosy and comforting dream.  After spending three restless nights at the cemetery, watching a loved one move on, this was almost a relief. However, this might have been a dream, but there is no doubt in my heart that this would happen if I had to choose between a loved one’s life, and my own.


7 thoughts on “The Pearly Gates

  1. lscotthoughts says:

    You do have a way of writing that eases your words from one to the another, vivid imagery and what a dream, Alex! Through your poetry I can tell you are a devoted brother~

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